I am a Feminist Because...

I am a feminist.

      Before you stop reading, please let me clarify a few things, because I’d hate to lose you after just one sentence.

I am a feminist. Yes, I know that all men aren’t like that. I know that there are good men in the world. I know because my father is a good man. My older brother is a good man. With their good example, my younger brother is growing into a good young man. I know that there are double standards for men, too. I know that many men struggle with the pressure of toxic masculinity, that they are expected to be strong and have minimal emotions. No, I do not hate men. I do not think that the solution to a world dominated by men is a world dominated by women. Women should not go from being oppressed to oppressing others. I’m not calling for a complete flip of power.

     
And I am still a feminist.

     Why?

     Not because I want to belittle good men, make them uncomfortable, offend them, or hurt them in any way.

     I am a feminist because there are men who do all these things to women on a daily basis. And like I said before, not all men do these things! But enough men do that there is a problem.

I am a feminist because I am scared to go to the public bathroom by myself. Men joke about women going to the bathroom in groups, but we do it for safety.

I am a feminist because I cross the street when a man is walking behind me.

I am a feminist because I know it would not be safe for me to walk outside alone in the first place.

I am a feminist because when I take my phone out in a group, people automatically assume that I am using it to text or call my boyfriend.

I am a feminist because I have been told I throw like a girl.

I am a feminist because I have been told by another woman that I should not wear floral patterns when presenting to an audience at corporate events because the men in the room must feel that I am “approachable” and “not too feminine.”

I am a feminist because it is considered a negative thing to be feminine.

I am a feminist because even before I get up in front of a corporate audience to make a presentation, I already know that 90% of it is going to be made up of men.

I am a feminist because people assume that I am physically weak because of my gender. Now, I happily admit that I am not a physically strong person. But that is because I do not work out or go out of my way to exercise every day to become stronger. Those are choices that I make about how I live my life as a person. Not as a woman.

I am a feminist because growing up, I played baseball in a non-gender-specific league, and over the course of three summers, I only met three other girls.

I am a feminist because women are attacked and retaliated against for saying “no.”

I am a feminist because there are men who do not respect a woman’s “no.”

I am a feminist because I have been told by my own female role models that I will have to wear makeup when I am older in order to be respected and taken seriously.

I am a feminist because if I wear too much when that time comes, I will be judged.

I am a feminist because if I do not wear enough, I will be judged.

I am a feminist because whether I want to wear makeup at all will not factor into that equation.

I am a feminist because there are women who are catcalled and yelled at walking down the street, sexualized and objectified.

I am a feminist because even though I know that catcalling is not right, I still feel like I am not as pretty or as desirable because I have never been catcalled.

I am a feminist because that is not okay.

I am a feminist because if I was trying to explain these serious and real things in a conversation, I wouldn’t have made it past my first sentence.

I am a feminist because I probably would have been interrupted before I could explain my point of view.

I am a feminist because that interruption would be to point out that not all men are like that, that men have problems and expectations, too.

I am a feminist because I had to write a paragraph clarifying that I am not a man-hater before I could get to my point.

I am a feminist because some men assume that feminism is man-hating, but it isn’t. That’s not what feminism is at all.

The right kind of feminism is not thinking that women are superior to men. Feminism is simply thinking that women are just as important as men, and we deserve to be treated as such.

I am a feminist because I still feel like I have to apologize for having these thoughts at all. For writing them down, for having an opinion, for using my voice.

I am a feminist so that one day, no woman will ever feel like that again.

Sincerely,
Fifteen

I DO NOT TAKE CREDIT FOR ANY OF THE QUOTES,PICTURES, SONGS, OR SCREENSHOTS OF POSTS THAT I INCLUDE IN MY BLOG. SOME OF THEM CREDIT THEIR OWNER IN THE SCREENSHOT, SOME OF THEM DO NOT CITE A SOURCE, BUT I DO NOT CLAIM THEM TO BE OF MY OWN MAKING. I SHARE THEM HERE BECAUSE THEY EXPLAIN WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY BETTER THAN I CAN WITH MY OWN WORDS, BUT I DO NOT CLAIM THEM TO BE MY OWN.